Grinding my meat

Sweet Hubby and I can live happily on leftovers, but I also love to cook.  I have about 30 cookbooks as well as stacks and stacks of clipped and copied recipes.  In fact, the day I stop collecting recipes is the day I'll know I have finally accepted that I'm eventually going to die.

Anyway, I felt like cooking this evening, but the recipes I was considering all called for ground chicken, and I only had thighs.  I really didn't feel like going to the grocery story.  And then I remembered.  In a big shoe box high up on the top shelf of a cupboard I don't use very often, there is a big iron meat grinder.

I don't know where I got it, although it's a good bet my mother passed it along to me and her mother had to her.  It's heavy and old and takes a bit of setting up - and it works just great.  I felt like Mrs. Lovett, turning that big handle, watching the bird muscle going in one opening whole and coming out the other opening ground up.  (This is probably making my vegan and vegetarian friends sick.)  I felt like a pioneer, like an elemental woman, like someone who could make jam or pickled okra from produce she grew herself.  It was delightful to discover what a pleasure such a simple act could be.  

I've been lugging that grinder around for decades, but it certainly earned it's keep tonight.  Next time I go to the store, I'm going to compare the cost of a pound of ground beef to a pound to good steak.  I may have some more grinding to do. 

Shish Taouk, beavers, and a good deed

A friend took me out today for a belated birthday lunch at my favorite Indian/Mediterranean restaurant.  Inspired as I am every day by this blog, I ordered something I'd never tried before, a dish called Shish Taouk, which turned out to be big pieces of spiced chicken and green bell pepper roasted on a skewer and served with vegetables over basmati rice.  It was quite good, and so was the conversation, especially since my friend is also a cat lover and allowed me to burble on and on about our two darling kitties.

After lunch I decided to take get my steps in by walking to a library to drop off a DVD, a distance of something over a mile.  On the way, I saw a rustic looking staircase across a parking lot, and, once again inspired by this blog, decided to investigate.  A sign at the top of the stairs told me I was entering Beaver Pond Natural Area.  The area was, indeed, left natural, not manicured at all but cluttered with twisted trees, many of them fallen.  I followed a muddy path alongside a creek, full of hope but no expectation that I might see beavers.  Whatever critters may have lived in the area surely knew I was there, but none revealed itself to me.  It was peaceful, though not particularly quiet since there is a main street nearby.

After leaving BPNA, I made my way to the library, then headed back toward my car for the second half of my walk, which took me past the light rail station.  A car pulled up and a flustered woman asked if I knew where she could drop off her daughter for the train.  I said "Let her out right here and I'll walk her to the station."  I might normally simply have given directions and been on my way, but I remember how daunting I found my first visit to the light rail, even though it's laid out quite sensibly.  It wasn't out of my way, and afforded me some of that Good Samaritan glow that comes from being nice to someone for no reason.

And there you have it, some, but not all, of the best parts of my day.

Brrrrrrrr

I have a book offering 365 suggestions for Somethings New to try.  One of the entries I marked to try but hadn't yet is "For the last minute of your shower or bath, adjust the water temperature to as cold as you can possibly stand it."  Then, in yesterday's mail, came a postcard from our real estate agent touting the benefits of a 30 second cold rinse, those benefits being: Stimulates white blood cell production and increases circulation in the blood and lymph systems; Heightens awareness and attention, and stimulates the release of endorphins and noradrenaline; Stimulates hair follicles; Makes it easier to get out of the shower.

So today I did that, stood in cold water for the last 30 or so seconds of my shower.  And you know, it wasn't bad at all (although I admit I didn't have the water turned as cold as it can get).  There is the first shock, which is what does all that stimulating mentioned above, but then the body adjusts and it becomes easier to tolerate.

When I go to a women's spa north of here, I always alternate sitting in the hot pools with dipping into the cold pool.  I can almost feel my pores snapping shut, and it feels sort of painfully good.  I think ending showers with cold water is something I'm going to continue doing now and then.  Maybe it's a vestige of Calvinism, or maybe just the pioneer spirit, which has me associate something being hard and painful with it being good for me.  A nice antidote to all the ways I live in warmth, sloth, and comfort. 

E Line - and, do birds yawn?

After being woken up by yet another kitty love fest, I did some around-the-house stuff: a bi-weekly conversation with my siblings, a Spanish lesson, putting away my laptop after Sweet Hubby finished with some sort of tech-y voodoo; refilling a prescription; writing a condolence card to the husband of a friend who died recently; that sort of thing.

Then came the fun of the day.  I took my car to Costco for fueling, then caught the E Line bus at the nearby transit center.  This bus runs down one of Seattle's few long, straight streets, which is home to cannabis shops and hookers and fast food joints and car repair garages.  I got off near my favorite park, which has a 3 mile walking path around a lake.  I've walked this path many times before, but seldom alone.  It was very relaxing to go my own pace, not have to make conversation (not that I mind conversation, as anyone who knows me will concur), just breathe and walk and see what I saw.

I noticed a blue heron crouched on a branch overhanging the lake and stopped to observe it for a while.  At one point, it stretched out its neck, which had been coiled up against its body, spread its wings, and I swear it looked as though it yawned.  Its great beak opened wide for a moment, and I thought I saw a skinny tongue curling up at the tip, as cats' do when they yawn.  It had never before occurred to me to wonder if birds yawn.  

I've just asked the Internet that question, and, if the information I found is true, all vertebrate animals yawn except for giraffes.  I never would have guessed.

Anyway, more walking, then back on the bus and the ride back to the transit center.  And now I know one more bus line than I had before, plus did a lot of walking, plus did some reading (C.S. Lewis' "The Four Loves").  And that has been my day so far.

WHG

This evening Sweet Hubby and I had dinner at an Italian place I've passed probably a hundred times but never tried in the 21 years I've been living here.  It was a good enough meal, as in good enough for once but not good enough to inspire a return visit.

The more important Something New, however, is a request I made to SH that he and I start setting aside a day every week, or bi-weekly, or once a month, for us to spend together.

SH recently instigated weekly hour-long WIG (When I'm [meaning him] Gone) conversations.  During that hour, we talk about those areas of our life which he handles (mostly finances and tech) that I would have to take on in the event he predeceased me.  He has promised I get to die first, but of course we both understand that is one promise he might unwillingly break.  These conversations are really tough, and sometimes emotional, for me, partly because they require me to pay attention to and understand things I would so much rather not deal with, but mostly because they force me to envision a life emptied of the love, affection, companionship, security, and joy he brings to our marriage.

And so I have asked that a day for us to spend together be regularly set aside, to do whatever strikes our fancy at the time.  We live in the same house and sleep in the same bed, naturally, but even so there are many days when we don't actually pay attention to each other, both of us being engaged in our separate pursuits.  And I know, with all my guts and soul, that if/when the day comes that I have to live without my SH, I will regret that I didn't pay more attention, that we didn't share more pastimes, that I sometimes listened with half an ear and looked at him with half an eye.

Right about now he might lighten the mood by saying there will come a time someday when I might be glad to be rid of him.  But we both know that will never be true.

My kitty teacher

Today after lunch, I came into my office to handle a slew of those little thises and thats which make up so much of our lives and which can pile up if not attended to.  I was planning to stay head down and accomplish quite a bit.

Moments later, sweet kitty Angel wandered in and climbed into my lap.  She twisted and turned and clambered a bit before finally settling belly up in my arms, closing her eyes, and going to sleep.

So I decided to sit there with her, still and peaceful, for a full 20 minutes.  It was reeeeeeeally challenging because I was surrounded by things I needed to do, and there was a load of laundry ready to be moved from the washer to the dryer, and the Costco purchases were still in the trunk of the car, and the dish washer needed unloading.  It was just about all I could do to keep from jumping out of my skin.  So I sat. 

I've heard it said "Sit in meditation for half an hour every day.  If you're very busy, sit for an hour." 

These exercises in sitting still have been some of the most difficult Somethings New I've attempted, but are probably also the most valuable.  They remind me how much of life I miss by going going going, or by sitting in front of my computer or the TV screen, lost in those and unaware of my surroundings.  Not that any of those times are completely wasted by any means.  But I know it's also good for me to stop, to breathe, to listen, to pay attention.  So I sat and enjoyed Angel's darling face and her little tremors as she dreamed.  

After all, if I had moved, Angel's nap would have been disturbed, and we can't have that.  Better I should sit and suffer the agonies of being still than to bother my kitty.  If she can sit and do nothing, by golly, I can, too.

Naked on the floor

A lot of today was spent having lunch and then watching "A Man Called Otto" with a girlfriend.

And by the way, if you haven't seen "AMCO", I  highly recommend it.  I loved it.  I laughed and I wept; I felt something, which is exactly what I go to the movies for.  Which is why I tire of sci fi, fantasy, CGI battles, etc.  They sometimes offer a sense of excitement, but I don't really feel anything much beyond tension or adrenalin.  Give yourself a treat and see "AMCO".  And take Kleenex.

Anyway, back to Something New.  Lunch and the movie didn't leave enough time for a trip to a museum or a long bus ride, and it was raining all day, so the weather didn't lend itself to a walk in a park or through a neighborhood.  But I was determined to think of something I could do that I haven't done before.

So I lay on the living room floor naked for half an hour.

The idea was to awaken all my senses: to feel the carpet on my back and the air moving on my skin; to hear whatever sounds there were, such a passing plane or car, or the muffled tapping of Sweet Hubby's fingers on his laptop keyboard; to notice when  my thoughts went galloping into the past or future and keep them as much in the present as possible.

I had planned to lie still, and if the kitties came snooping around, I was going to let them explore without reacting or reaching out to them.  But when Bandy kitty's sharp little claw accidently hit, shall we say, a certain sensitive area, I modified my intention to include protecting my sweet bits.

One thing I noticed is how much less tense I am than I was during the 26 years I lived in Los Angeles.  Several times in L.A. (and once in London), I spent an hour floating in an isolation tank (also called a Samadhi tank), and each time, throughout the entire hour, groups of clamped up muscles would release, muscles I hadn't even known I was clenching.  Even floating in body temperature water, I was not able to completely relax.  But today I was aware of how little time it took to mentally run through my body and release any tense places I found.  It was quite delightful and relaxing. 

#347

Today was another ride-the-bus day.  This one took me to a town which I'm not familiar with, a bit north of home, so once I reached the last stop, I got off and walked around for a while, then had a tasty chicken bahn mi sandwich, walked around a lot more, then caught the same bus in the opposite direction.  I got off at a coffee shop near home and had a really good writing session, working on my latest full length.  Then another nice long walk home.

I know these bus trips, and walking around un-extraordinary neighborhoods, must not seem particularly daring, and maybe not even all that interesting.  But for me, there is a certain thrill in riding a bus on an unfamiliar route, noting where it goes and therefore when I can use it in future.  And I love walking around neighborhoods, either commercial or residential, seeing houses and yards, discovering new restaurants.  It's the best way I can think of to multiply my steps for the day (11,494 so far today!).  In a way, this bus riding could be seen as not terribly productive (besides helping me stay true to the Something New promise), but in another way, it feels like a really good way to spend a few hours, getting to know more of the area I live in, and it keeps me from sitting in front of a computer all day, which I can easily do if I don't keep an eye on myself.  

Also, riding a bus or train is good reading time for me, since I don't get motion sickness.  And reading time always feels well spent.  Currently I'm making my way through C.S. Lewis' "The Four Loves". 

Dancing again

When I left Los Angeles and moved north, first to the central CA coast and then to Seattle, I discovered social dancing, specifically contra and English country dancing.  Seattle is the dancing-est city I've ever been in, with both kinds of dances and many others available every week.  I was never in my life in better shape than when I was dancing robustly for 3 hours a night two or three times a week.  A lot of my new friends came from the dance community.

However, a couple of important love relationships began and ended on the contra dance floor, and after the second one, I started getting psychosomatic nausea every time I danced.  I know it was psychosomatic because I could do any other kind of dancing, and could go on amusement park rides and get twirled around upside down and backward without even feeling dizzy or sick  Finally, I gave up dancing, except for a couple of swing and line dancing classes Sweet Hubby and I took together.  I was married now and had my darling SH to socialize with.  I didn't want to be gone that many nights a week, and although SH is a terrific, graceful dancer, regular dancing isn't for him.  I stayed friends with some of the people I'd met through that community, and of course there are many other ways to get exercise, so it wasn't a terrible loss, but I did miss it.

This evening, though, I decided to go to an English country dance session for the first time in about 15 years.  And I'm so glad I did.  I do enjoy dancing, enjoy the music, the social contact, the excellent, fun workout.  I didn't stay for the whole evening, mostly because there were a lot of newbies in the room, and so a lot of instruction, which made the evening move very slowly.  But I think I'm going to start dipping into English country again, and maybe even try contra dancing to see if my psychosoma has healed.

If you don't know what contra dancing is, by the way, imagine square dancing done in long lines with live fiddle and banjo music setting the beat and a caller leading the dancers through series of movements.  If you've never tried it, look it up and see if there is a dance near you.  So much fun.

Balance

I decided to do a balance workout today.  I keep hearing that balance is very important for us elders, and more difficult to maintain as we age.  Jane Fonda always emphasizes balance in her workouts for seniors.  There are lots of balance workouts on YouTube, so I chose one at random and spent a bit of time following the leader.

I think my balance may already be pretty good, because these exercises were quite simple for me to do, even without holding on to a surface, which is what the workout leader suggested.  The hardest exercise was walking while turning my head from side to side and than up and down.  I did stagger a bit on that one.  But I can stand on one leg without holding on to anything for at least a minute.

I think I'm going to do more of these, because I agree that balance fitness is as important as aerobic and strength fitness.  I could probably try a new video every day for a month and not repeat.  And it's fun and easy to do within the confines of my little office.

I'm going to have to close my door for these workouts, though, because my new, sweet, adorable little kitties love to come in and explore, often getting silently underfoot.  One of the reasons I need to make sure that my balance is strong is that I swear to Odin, someday I'm going to trip on a kitten and take a real fall if I'm not constantly vigilant.  Being a cat lover, naturally I would take a tumble myself rather than squash my kitty by stepping on her.

Walking the campus

I have a book of stair walks all around the Seattle area, so today I took the train to the University district and did a mapped walk around the UW campus.  I got lost once - well, not really lost; I just didn't follow the book's directions well, but I'm familiar enough with the campus to find my way back on track.  At one point I had to detour because the stairway the book calls the prettiest and the authors' favorite was blocked off.  But even with those kerfluffles, I got to see parts of the campus I'd never found before, and got more than 10,000 steps in the bargain.

After this lovely walk, I took the train back to where I'd parked the car, got myself a ham crepe at a coffee house, and worked on my latest full length play.  I had put this play aside a few months ago because I was really struggling to find the story, but it has since revealed itself to me and I'm so happy to be back at work on it, even though I know there is a lot more writing and rewriting to come.

Those two activities, the long walk and the writing session, have already made this a productive day, and it's only 4:30.  Time for my Spanish lesson, some reading, and lots of kitty time.  I love my life.  

Should oughta, don't wanna

It wasn't a very splashy day today, but very, very satisfying.  I did four of the items on my "one of these days in the vague future I'm going to get around to that" list.  I'm keeping watch on what I'm avoiding and really cheerleading myself on to just gosh darned dive in and do it already.  The sense of relief and lightening is the perfect reward.  The act of avoidance does take some energy, after all.

None of these items was difficult, although a couple were a bit time consuming.  I'm not always even sure why I put them off.  Probably just a matter of "I don't feel like it, I'd rather do something funner, or not do anything at all."  Tonight I get to go to bed feeling virtuous, and that, too, is a reward.

Speaking of which, since the first day of this new year, I have been sleeping until 9, 9:30, once even until 10 o'clock!  I have no idea what has happened to my circadian rhythm or internal alarm clock or whatever it is that used to wake me up between 5:30 and 7:30.  I haven't changed my evening routines.  It's a mystery, and mostly a happy thing, but it does make the day a bit shorter, so I need to start being productive right away instead of shuffling around in my slippers wondering what the day will be like.

#330

What a good day.  I got all sorts of things done, and enjoyed myself to boot.

First I got the news postings on my website all caught up.  Good to get that done, and I must stay more caught up and post as the news of productions comes usp  

Then I took another bus that stops close to the house.  This one let me off near one of my favorite restaurants, so I took myself to lunch - a nice pear-cranberry-blue cheese salad - while I finished reading another Stephen Crane story and wrote a letter to a friend.  Yes, wrote, yes, a letter.  My cursive writing has gone to hell since I (and we all) started using computers for just about everything.  But I do have a couple of friends with whom I exchange letters, which are a treat to send and to receive.

It was a chilly, clear day, so I started walking, thinking I would catch the same bus back when it passed me, but I ended up walking the whole way, a couple of miles, on streets I haven't walked before.  I do love looking at houses, wondering about the people who live in them.  "What a pretty yellow door.  I wonder why they decided to paint it that startling color."  "What are they going to use that huge pile of gravel for?"  "Why would anyone want a monkey puzzle tree anywhere near their home?"  It's the playwright in me, always making up stories about people.  I just can't help myself. 

#348

Today I did something that I've wanted to do for a long time.  I hopped on a bus at a stop near my house and rode it to the end of the line, just to see where it went.  I'd like to do that with all of the nearby buses, and start using more public transportation, for the sake of both convenience and the environment.

This one took me to an area near the Sound, a neighborhood I seldom go to.  I found a nice little coffee shop and had an iced pineapple boba tea (also a first) and a muffin, and worked on a play-in-progress, then took the bus most of the way home and walked the last mile, thus fulfilling several of my promises for the day.  It was cold and sunny, a pretty day, so I called Sweet Hubby to come meet me on my walk home.  All in all, a sweet start to the new year. 

Welcome to the new year

Today's Something New: I have decided that this year, instead of making any resolution, I'm going to start every day by making a list of those things that I want to accomplish that day.  I think AA has it right; making promises every day is a lot more powerful, and will no doubt last longer, than making a promise for life or even for a year.  But I want this to be more than a list of To-do's.  Besides specific chores and errands, I want to have on that list what I might want to accomplish emotionally, and how I want to be in the world, and small changes I'd like to make to my behavior.  For example, the number of steps to take or the amount of time I will spend working out; how much time to spend writing, or doing something about writing, such as making submissions to theaters; continuing to look for something new I can try every day; continuing to explore and challenge myself; people I want to be sure to write to (email yes, but I also still write letters and cards) or reach out to; in what specific way I'm going to eat more healthily; something I might do for Sweet Hubby.

I wish you and those you love a year of good health and peace of mind, as well whatever you most wish for yourself.  Look for the good and you will find it.  Be honorable and goodness will find you.  And, as they say in Shangri-La, be kind.

Cheers and cheering.